No seriously. What the hell?
Dude, we talked for three days straight until 5 a.m. We had these deep conversations about our thoughts and our feelings and our interests. We talked about our music. We talked about games, movies, books, and we had almost identical interests. We talked about how all we both wanted was love. Now, here you are, totally ditching me for no apparent reason. You've bailed on me twice, didn't even bother to come and look for me or just say hi. From what I heard, you didn't waste any time hopping on that bus and going directly home. You talked about me to your douchebag friend who made bad assumptions and is still creeped out by me FOR NO GOOD FUCKING REASON other than I'm two years younger than you guys and one of my friends was an idiot, a fact that no one believes. I don't know if you meant those things. I don't know if you were sincere or not. I don't know how I feel. I'm sad, angry, hopeful, and depressed again. I pushed people away so I could get close to you. I put the final blow into the dying non-relationship another boy thought we were in so that maybe, just maybe, I could be closer to someone who actually showed care and emotion, who actually appreciated my talents without someone thinking that I was theirs and I couldn't talk to any guys outside our circle of friends. And the truth was, I hadn't been "theirs" since last fucking August. We broke up, but they still hung around annoyingly until I told them I didn't want them to stay...the prick. You hang out with bad people, no offense, and you do some things that others may consider bad. But all I can see is good in you. That's why I wanted to be your friend. But now, the question is this...
Do you really want to be my friend?
I would rather have you tell me the truth rather than stringing me along for the sake of politeness. Other people have done it and it's very hurtful.
I don't want to get hurt again.
Last weekend, talking to you was the best. I felt happy knowing someone out there found me worth talking to.
Now, I'm scared. Because once again...
I'm not sure of anything.
And I really fucking hate that feeling.