Crayon-sama

I can't pony hair.
What even is style.

Fade Into You
Fade Into You
Fade Into You
Fade Into You

I look at what you've done and what you've said and realized I've fallen in love with you...but you don't care for me at all in the way I want you to. It's not fair it's not fair...I want to hold the hand inside you...I want to a take a breath that's true...It's not at all fair.
Why don't they ask me to dances?
No one has dared.
Am I that scary?
That scary that boys can't converse with me without fearing a bite on the hand?
So all I can do is bother you into the wee small hours of the morning, crying myself to sleep, Fade Into You by Mazzy Star on repeat, telling myself that it's not fair, it's not fair, it's not...

No seriously.  What the hell?
Dude, we talked for three days straight until 5 a.m.  We had these deep conversations about our thoughts and our feelings and our interests.  We talked about our music.  We talked about games, movies, books, and we had almost identical interests.  We talked about how all we both wanted was love. Now, here you are, totally ditching me for no apparent reason.  You've bailed on me twice, didn't even bother to come and look for me or just say hi.  From what I heard, you didn't waste any time hopping on that bus and going directly home.  You talked about me to your douchebag friend who made bad assumptions and is still creeped out by me FOR NO GOOD FUCKING REASON other than I'm two years younger than you guys and one of my friends was an idiot, a fact that no one believes.  I don't know if you meant those things.  I don't know if you were sincere or not.  I don't know how I feel.  I'm sad, angry, hopeful, and depressed again.  I pushed people away so I could get close to you.  I put the final blow into the dying non-relationship another boy thought we were in so that maybe, just maybe, I could be closer to someone who actually showed care and emotion, who actually appreciated my talents without someone thinking that I was theirs and I couldn't talk to any guys outside our circle of friends.  And the truth was, I hadn't been "theirs" since last fucking August.  We broke up, but they still hung around annoyingly until I told them I didn't want them to stay...the prick. You hang out with bad people, no offense, and you do some things that others may consider bad.  But all I can see is good in you.  That's why I wanted to be your friend.  But now, the question is this...
Do you really want to be my friend?
I would rather have you tell me the truth rather than stringing me along for the sake of politeness.  Other people have done it and it's very hurtful.
I don't want to get hurt again.
Last weekend, talking to you was the best.  I felt happy knowing someone out there found me worth talking to.
Now, I'm scared.  Because once again...
I'm not sure of anything.
And I really fucking hate that feeling.

Convention Speaker: The coming generation.
Charly Gordon: Test-tube conception, laboratory birth, TV education, brave new dreams, brave new hates, brave new wars; a beautifully purposeless process of society suicide.
-Charly (1968)

You want your sister to lose weight? Tell her to get off the couch, stop eating Twinkies and maybe go out for field hockey. You know what? No one ever knows what they want to be when they grow up. You know, it takes a little, little while to find that out. Right, Jim? And you. Yeah, you. Sick of some jerk shoving your head down the toilet? Well, you know what? Maybe you should lift some weights or take a karate lesson. And the next time he tries to do it, you kick him in the balls.